


The Day I Realized

by suzunesays



Category: SLBP - Fandom, Samurai Love Ballad Party - Fandom, Voltage Inc - Fandom
Genre: Angst, F/M, Romance, Route Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-16
Updated: 2016-07-16
Packaged: 2019-09-21 11:23:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17042810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/suzunesays/pseuds/suzunesays
Summary: "The day I realized I was in love was dark and cold and wet and all I remember was the color of her eyes."The very first fanfic I wrote for SLBP (samurai love ballad party) fandom. It was based on a prompt, and I loved it so much - it seemed to fit perfectly with Saizo's character. The fanfic starts off in the middle of Saizo's route, and written from his third person POV and details the moment he realizes he's fallen in love with you.





	The Day I Realized

_"The day I realized I was in love was dark and cold and wet and all I remember was the color of her eyes."_

It was night, and the frigid rain that fell outside the abandoned hut showed no signs of relenting. Saizo stumbled into the hut, fell to his knees, and collapsed face down on the middle of the packed dirt floor. It was cold and dark in the hut, and his body shivered from his rain soaked clothes. His breathing was heavy as his fever ravaged his body. Heh, he thought, you deserve to feel this pain, you bastard. All alone with your sin in the darkness. Don’t wish for death, you have much longer to suffer before you can atone for what you’ve done. He closed his eyes, and noticed the rain seemed to fall harder now. He was too ill to care when he heard the door slam open, followed by the sound of concerned footsteps rushed toward him. It was Suzune. He didn’t have to open his eyes to know it was her. He waved off her concerns as she rolled his body over.

“Saizo, you idiot! Who would leave you alone right now?” She gently cradled his head in her arms, her actions in stark contrast with her harsh words. He smiled at her touch, and fluttered his eyelids open for a brief moment. His eyes met her gaze... her warm, soft brown eyes, full of compassion, concern, and… dare he wish for it… love. Her eyes were the last thing he saw before everything went dark.

The next thing he knew, he was sitting beneath a cherry blossom tree, crying. " _It hurts_ ," he thinks to himself, _"I never want to care for another person ever again. It hurts and I just want to die, but I don’t deserve death. I deserve to be tortured for the rest of my days for what I’ve done."_  His soul was on fire, burning with the gut wrenching despair that comes from inescapable sadness and guilt. He didn’t deserve kindness. Ever. For the rest of his life. He shivered. He was cold and wet, and his body felt heavy as lead. He closed his eyes, trying to get lost in the darkness behind his lids.

A soft, gentle hand touches his shoulder and he hears a voice as soft as the wind that blows the blossoms off the branches. “Saizo,” it whispers, “Saizo, why are you so sad?” He looks to the voice and his eyes blink in confusion. Instead of Suzune as a small child, he sees her as the beautiful woman she is now. _"Wh-wha… how,"_ he wonders to himself, wide eyed. A tear rolls down his cheek and Suzune wipes it with her fingertips. “Please,” she pleads, “let me ease your troubles, Saizo.” Her large, kind eyes waver as tears begin to well up in them. She continued, “When you’re hurt, I hurt, too.”

Saizo sat staring into her eyes. Her kind brown eyes, they never lied. Inside her eyes, he was someone worthy to be loved. In her eyes was a reflection of himself that he wanted to be, someone that could stand by her side without fear, or guilt. She knelt beside him and gently took him in her arms, cradling him like one would a small child who was hurt. She placed his head against her chest and stroked his hair. " _No,"_ he screamed internally, " _No you can’t do this. You mustn’t love me. I’m… I’m not…"_  She interrupted his thoughts by whispering, “Shh, it’s okay. Don’t you know? When you love someone, you vow to love _all_ of them. Even the ugliest parts. And I do, I love all of you. I love you, Saizo.” He trembled. Not from the cold, but from letting go of his hold of hatred for himself. He looked up into her eyes once more, and found himself slowly reaching up to touch her face. She smiled softly as his fingers gently took hold of her chin and pulled her lips towards him, sharing a ghost of a kiss. Her arms tightened around him slightly, and released as he pulled back to look up into her eyes. She smiled down at him. The voice in his head choked out, _I… I love you..._

He awoke to the sun’s rays on his face. His body felt warm, and… soft? He wondered as he opened his eyes to find himself being held in the same position as she was holding him in his dreams. Her gentle, rhythmic breathing indicated she was still asleep. He turned his head to the side slightly and smiled. His heart clenched in his chest as he remembered the last words of his dream. He sat up slowly, and she stirred a little. He grabbed the robe off his shoulders and covered her sleeping form with it. And then, without knowing how it happened, he softly kissed her lips. He pulled back and sighed. _"_ _Dear, oh dear,"_ he thought to himself, smiling at her innocent sleeping face. _"It seems I’m in love with you, little lady."_ As he finished his thought, she smiled in her sleep. “Hmmm, Saizo,” she whispered. Her eyelids fluttered softly, not quite awake, but not quite asleep either. His heart thumped when he catches a glimpse of her brown eyes looking up at him. “Shh,” he whispered, “go back to sleep.” She nodded and drifted back into a deep sleep. He wistfully sighed as he closed his eyes.

_"I’ll lock my love for you deep, deep inside. No one can ever know. But when I close my eyes, I’ll always see your warm gaze, your lovely eyes in my mind… At least allow me that much, my dear."_


End file.
